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Fuck. Binged.

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Hmm :/

Disappointed in myself right now.  I always seem to overeat on days when I got to my Dads. I swear he is trying to overfeed me. I’m so angry and furious and upset with myself. The binge appears to be over and to be fair it has been worse. Overall, today’s fuck up has been sponsored by Morrisons and Iceland.

A pack of crisps and Cheese and Onion Dip.

A Kinder Bueno.

2 Happy Hippos.

A slice of toast on butter.

Super Noodles.

Half a Bowl of Special K

3 Strawberry Shortbreads

fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Also goddamnit. T___T



Day Three of the Fruit and Veg diet!

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Today was oddly successful for a day spent primarily in the house. Still no luck in the job front so I really need to get college finance forms done as soon as possible. The plan was to keep on with the fruit and veg diet but I had a few slip ups here and there. Let’s go over them….



Tin of Diet Fizzy Juice

Cereal. (230kcal)

Normally I would have stuck to having a pear for breakfast but I settled for half a bowl of cereal and milk because of the diet juice I think. The sweeteners cause sugar cravings and there is a lot of sugar in cereal. Maybe I need to lay off the diet fizzy. As I woke up starving, I veered towards the diet fizzy for a burst of bubbles to fill my tummy and th at’s maybe the problem…

At least there was some milk in the cereal….



Crispbreads and cottage cheese (200kcal)

I woke up late today to my breakfast was late and having lunch at this time would have been detrimental and pointless. So, instead, I had a snack instead of a lunch. It was rather small but meh. Dinner was not long from then.



Salad, ham, crispbread and cottage cheese – 350kcal (MAX)

Lovely and just the right quantity. I only ever use small plates now and that’s enough to fill me 🙂



Pear – 100kcal

Found myself starving around 10pm and instead of attempting to go to bed I decided to have a pear. I could kill for a takeaway….must RESIST!

One of the tips I find most useful when calorie counting is round up, especially with calories. Since my Base Metabolism Rate is only 1400kcal, I need to eat less than that to lose weight. It’s important to stay around 1000kcalories. As such, if I eat something that is 49kcal, I put it down as 50kcal, if something is 51kcal, I put it down as 100kcal. I try to make sure this doesn’t go over. However, if I eat my jellies, I need to eat at least 6before they are put down as 100kcal. 🙂 I group together. Might be something to try out. I NEVER eat anything I don’t know the caloric content of. No matter HOW chocolatey, crispy, salty, sugary, or tastey it looks.


Comfort Eating (part 1)

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Heh. I put part 1 as I will probably end up mentioning it again.

I have a litle interactive thing for you to do tonight. 🙂

Firstly, I want you to get some paper and a pen. Go on, I’ll wait.

(note: Get off your fat ass and get some paper.*)

Got paper? ….. I’m not continuing until you do.

Now? You do? About bloody time. Good Let’s continue 🙂

Right. Comfort foods.

Simply what it says on the label. We want to eat these foods because they comfort us. However, the problem is that comfort foods can be more than just the unhealthy foods that we see everyday. a.k.a chocolate, crisps (chips), french fries (chips!) and burgers, pizza, cakes, etc. Sometimes comfort food is “normal” food.

What makes a comfort food? Is it the high calories? Is it the “I shouldn’t be eating this I’m so naughty.” or is it the connections we have to it? Well, in reality it’s a little bit of all three. The connotations of eating or doing something we shouldn’t plays back to the simplest of human psychology. I can’t have it, so I want it. That’s why restrictive diets that completely cut out “bad foods” don’t work! The body wants what it can’t have.

Fair enough, if you don’t like chocolate, don’t eat it problem solved. But if you’re the chocolate nommer of San Diego then we’re in a bit of a pickle aren’t we….

Anyway. What I want you to do is think. (OOOooh tough I know, but don’t hurt yourself!). Think. What’s your guilty pleasure? Is it roast beef? Chocolate? Hummus? Rice Pudding? Coconut? Peanut flavoured soup. Write it down.  Is this food one of your compulsive eats? Doesn’t matter if you think of more than one, write them down on seperate pieces of paper and after we’re finished you can do it again if you want. (It may help if you do). Again, knowledge is power.

Right. Think about how this food makes you feel. Question why? Explain why. Ask Why again?Let me offer an example as a support. A comfort food for me is Chocolate. (Baring in mind I haven’t eaten chocolate in three days, I’m going to go insane if I don’t have a little nibble of some soon….)

Okay so Chocolate  makes me feel happy. Why? It tastes nice and I associate it with a treat. Why? Because when I had a good day at school, my mum would treat me to a chocolate bar. Chocolate was a treat, therefore I want it all the time (slight exageration) to emulate those feelings reinforced from childhood. Understand? I hope it makes sense. Another reason? Often when I’m on my period (sorry guys) chocolate was given to me in an attempt to cheer me up/make me feel better. Does it work? No, however, this reinforces the IDEA that it might.  Yes?

The IDEA that we are going to enjoy this food is a comfort to us.
I’m going to follow with another story of my childhood. xD

When I was in primary (elementary) school, my gran and mum used to take me to a little cafe sometimes called “La Sparenza” (if you can translate this for me in the comments that’d be grand). I used to get a filled roll (barm, bun, dunno what you call ’em) for lunch. The whole cafe used to smell like chicken tikka and that was was I would get on this roll. Chicken Tikka. The oddest thing about this chicken tikka was that it was pink! Not red, not reddy pink, bright pink! PINK. HOT PINK.  But it was so lovely. Even today I can barely remember the dusty white flour from the rolls cloudying up my fingers, the sweet chewy taste of the chicken tikka, the smell of my gran’s coffee, but I would still love to taste that chicken tikka again.

One day not so long again I went back to La Sparenza to get a filled roll and looked around for my chicken tikka filling. However, I couldn’t see it so I asked the woman behind the counter.

“Oh! Did you stop serving chicken tikka?”

To which the woman looked at me in confusion before pointing to a mouldy-brown coloured filling with a few lumps of chicken sticking out of it.

“It’s right here.”

Well, needless to say I was gutted. They changed the recipe. They ruined my chicken tikka, and to this day I have never found my lost pink chicken tikka filling…. 😥

However, the principal is the same. We want to emulate those feelings of comfort and safety we found as a child, especially with stressful situations, oh I’ll come to that in a later post. Don’t worry!


Anyway, once you discover why you eat these things and why they bring you comfort, you can enforce new foods in a similar way, such as salad or healthier foods. Maybe even remove the temptation to eat these foods. However, I should prolly point out it is NOT a good idea to cut out comfort foods altogether straight away. If you stop completely you’ll yearn for these foods and end up overdoing it. No, the trick is limiting it, or making space for it by exercising or cutting back on some other luxury. At least, that works for me. I substitute sweet things with my weightwatchers jelly. It’s sweet, comforting and at only 10 calories, I can have 19 more before I eat more than the calories in a chocolate bar….. given that I can only eat three at a time, that’ll be a laugh.  The trick is finding the foods that work for you.  I stress the importance of this. If you have to eat three pounds of  ham and a packet of cheesy wotsits, chances are, you’ll be better eating the cheesy wotsits right amirite?

Kind of….. it’s not healthy, but it will stop the pounds creeping up. Well, there is some level of hard work involved here guys. Self control. It sounds like I’m contradicting myself, but I’m really not. Like I said, find your strengths and work to them make it a little easier on yourself by working harder. 🙂

Anyway, I hope that made some sense and you learned something new. 🙂 Later’s taters. x

*If you take offence to this you are acknowledging that you have a fat ass and that my comment was directed at you personally which it was not ;P